4 Signs You're Giving Too Much of a Good Thing:
In keeping this post relative to personal productivity, I would like to center on helping you to recognize when you're strengths are being overplayed so that you can discover that sweet-spot that exists within the continuum of giving too much and giving too little in making decisions regarding relationships,
interpersonal communication, and managing tasks.
Let's be honest here, if you could work, live, and associate with those who are most like your awesome self, you probably wouldn't have to work so hard to get along with those who differ from you. Right?
But ahhhh! Each one of you has an orientation; the way you see life, values, goals, and strengths. From this perspective, you form ideas, images, paradigms, and viewpoints that shape how you determine what is meaningful and important to you; how you communicate; and how well you get along with key people in your life.
All of your life, you have developed strengths. There may be times that you are aware of those strengths being used. Then there may be times when you discover new strengths that you need to develop.
At Presence With Purpose, we use the words; strengths and excesses. The reason behind this is because in our society, we are constantly reminded of our weaknesses. So let's just focus on your strengths. As opposed to using the term, weakness, we simply explain that your excesses are strengths that you overplay in a given situation. When things are going well, it is easy to slip from the productive use of our strengths into unproductive excess without realizing it. We tend to do more of what we love and enjoy doing. So, in one situation, your "good thing" may be that you are a task-driven person, which is ideal when there is a job that needs to be completed. Because your focus may primarily be on meeting a specific goal in a pre-determined time-frame, when that "good thing" characteristic is overplayed, your enthusiastiasm and determination may be interpreted as being overbearing and exacting to a spouse, co-worker, teammate, or in other relationships or situations.
Conversely, if you are a relationship-oriented person, one of your main objectives is to obtain harmony or ensure that everyone feels appreciated and valued. These characteristics make for good team collaboration, healthy relationships, and good communication. Because you value people and their feelings of being accepted and understood, when these traits are in excess or being overplayed, they may detract from actual tasks and goals that need to be completed in a timely manner. These are just two examples of the continuum that exists between doing too little and doing too much.
So, what are 4 signs that you may be giving too much of a "good thing"?
1. You are over committed. You try harder and harder to prove that you are doing something to benefit others. You enjoy helping someone in need, or love helping others to develop their strengths, but often discover that you are losing yourself, and neglecting your needs. Allow people the opportunity to do take responsibility for pulling their own weight, and taking ownership for their choices and decisions.
2. You are sabotaging your relationships at home or work. You find yourself taking control with key people in your life, and trying to navigate the direction that you think is most important without taking into consideration the feelings, opinions, and context of others. Your confidence may come across as arrogance. Here's where you get to develop the strength of listening and avoid being domineering. Practice reflective listening so that the person knows that you are genuinely interested in what he or she has to say or feel.
3. You are over-analyzing, and not completing tasks. You are probably staying in your head too much. In other words, your ability to critically think may lead to analysis paralysis or nit-picking. You are rehearsing every minute detail of a situation to the point where you are paralyzing your efforts. Although it's good to gather facts, data, and information, remain open to change as well as fresh and new ideas. Come back to the table later.
4. You are indecisive too often and lack conviction, which leads to your being unproductive. More than likely, you are probably letting your feelings get in the way. Although you have great ideas, you may be finding it difficult to narrow down specific goals. Try securing an accountability partner with whom you can share what you would like to accomplish. Make a list of pluses and minus; and always start with a weekly action plan, and a daily to-do-list.
Always remember that you are divinely created with many gifts and strengths. If you recognize yourself in any of these scenarios, I would the opportunity to sit down together and create a personal development package for you. In the meantime, get busy using your incredible strengths and being your awesome self!
Make this your BEST day ever!.